I have already read about them on other blogs beforehand. About those wedding party guests who ask strange questions about your wedding and make unreasonable demands. Those people, who seem like they want to drive you crazy. Those who look like they really put in a lot of effort to turn you into a ‘bridezilla’ even though you already worked so hard so far not to be one.
Up until now I have cried many times already, as I did not want to have a wedding party in the first place. I really try to make the whole planning period as stressless as possible for me, but still, people make a stab at (unintentionally) driving me nuts.
Here is a short summary of the many comments I got the last three months since we announced our engagement and wedding plans. As to protect the people’s identities I will leave out their names – but you will probably be able to guess from whom some of them are anyway.
“Are you getting married because you are pregnant?”
Because we cannot get married just out of love?
“Should I buy you an expensive necklace as a wedding present so you can show off at your big day?”
For me, who is too stingy to buy brand name clothing and recycles everything as often as possible? For me, who is too paranoid to get anything expensive which could be stolen by someone?
“Can we panda-nap your future husband for a bachelor night-weekend in (insert any random European city)?”
Have you never seen Hangover, Hangover II or Hangover III?
“Why did you not tell me about your wedding? How do you think will I feel and react when I get your invitation?”
Maybe we did not tell you because you are a strange person who only gossips about other people behind their backs and you therefore cannot be trusted at all? And why do you think you will get an invitation in the first place anyway?
“Can I bring my ex-boyfriend?”
Because you do not know so many people at my small wedding, because I only want to invite my closest friends who I want to spend such an important day with?
“How about inviting your aunt’s husband’s son?
The guy who grew up with his mom and I only met for the first time when I was 14? The guy who I only see two times a year when we do not even talk with each other at most?
“Can I invite my eight best friends with their families?”
30 extra people who do not even greet me when they see me outside a Chinese restaurant because I look like any other Austrian girl to them?
“Are you going to invite your 15 year old pubescent cousin’s girlfriend?”
The one whom he French-kissed with the whole time at our grandma’s Christmas party for the last two years?
“Can I bring my girlfriend?”
The one we do not know about and you are only dating for three weeks?
(Well, actually yes. He asked us when we did not know about her and they were only dating for three weeks. I finally met her the day before yesterday and she is an awesome woman. So do not f**k it up, Mr. Panda’s friend!)
And to all those who I left utterly speechless when I told them we will not have a church wedding:
No. No. No. Get your things toghether, we are not living in medieval times anymore.
Which strange questions did you get about your wedding? Or are my guests the only ones who randomly invite others?